End of a love: how to get out of it without (too) badly

TAKE IT AT THE FAR – It is the exact opposite of the previous technique and can make sense if we still hope to improve the couple situation and avoid the definitive break. The warnings, the warning signs and the attempt to dialogue are always a way to try, if we are not yet resolved to give up. After all, a little time can serve both of you …

THE GOODIST OPTION – It is not your fault: I am not ready; you are perfect, but we met at the wrong time. It is a tactic that works because the other does not feel challenged too much. And maybe even leaves the door open for a possible rethinking.

THE GHOST TECHNIQUE – In the Anglo-Saxon world it is called ghosting and consists in turning into a ghost. That is: it is a matter of disappearing. You block contacts on your smartphone, on social networks, you stop attending the places where you used to meet, for some time you visit different companies. Too cruel? We make our intentions known to our quasi-ex and then disappear.

IF WE HAVE ANOTHER – In this case, a bit of delicacy is really needed. If, while we go out with a boy, we have met someone we like best, the communication must be clear, but tactfully, given that we really have a share of responsibility. We are waiting for the right moment, avoiding the day when he is more tired / stressed / plagued by other concerns, and we explain the situation. Sincerity is the best strategy, but without reproaches, recriminations. And then, we don't try to remain friends: it is much better to disappear for a while, without calling him two days later because we feel guilty and want to know "how he is".

SEARCH FOR PRIVACY – Whatever the reason that pushes us to break, we avoid public announcements at all costs. Leaving is a very private fact and, in the face of this regret, everyone has the right to react in a way that is far from prying eyes and ears. If the proverbial drop that spills the vase comes while you are in the company of other people, we count to ten and hold back for the time necessary to create a secluded situation. The blatant scenes leave a bitter taste in everyone's mouth: to him, to us and to the friends who are there to assist.

AN ESPECIALLY FEMININE PROBLEM – Let's face it: we women are the ones to ask the question. Mostly the gentlemen take the delicacy into little consideration. If they decide to close with a girl, they just do it; often they simply go into hiding, perhaps with the help of a text message or an email. If the relationship was not long lasting and a direct confrontation embarrasses us, it could be a strategy to imitate.